Life Explosion

It is October and I was supposed to post a goal recap a few days ago but my life exploded on Monday so I’m behind. But I wanted to at least put this out there and keep myself somewhat on track. I’m also behind on my blogs so I’m sorry, I will get caught up as soon as things slow somewhat and I can think again.

1. Improve my overall situation in my life – I really feel like this just isn’t going to happen this year. I am still battling with the breathing troubles. The doctors all agree something is wrong, they just don’t know what. I’m frustrated. I lost my job because they just couldn’t keep extending my leave. I understand that completely. But it leaves me no options. My dad is in Hospice care and is reaching the point that he has a couple weeks left with us. My grandpa (my mom’s dad) is in renal failure and does not wish to have dialysis (which I can’t blame him, he’s 90) and is going to be coming home today or tomorrow to die. His wife, my grandma, has Alzheimer’s and can’t be left alone. My mom and aunt have no power of attorney or anything over her. Oh and the icing on the cake, I’m dealing with fleas. I kind of feel like this goal is going the complete opposite direction I intended.
2. Blog at least three times a week – The last couple of weeks this has been a struggle. I’m spending a lot of time at my parents and when I’m home and have free time I’m knitting because its one of the only things I can do that keeps me calm and sane.
3. Read 50 books and blog reviews of them – I’m on track with this reading goal but terribly behind on my reviews. I don’t see myself getting too caught up on that this month but maybe in November.
4. Run/walk a 5K – I could just be feeling very pessimistic right now but I don’t think this will be happening. I am having some osteomanipulation for my rib alignment but all that’s really done is make me more sore. I don’t see another doctor besides them until November 22. So unless something miraculously changes, I’m afraid I need to cross off this goal.
5. Knit a temperature blanket – Knitting is the one area that keeps hanging on for me. I did not take a picture of my temperature blanket because I need to lay it out on the floor and well, fleas. So no picture this month. I did decide to try a podcast so if you are still reading this and are bored and want to take a look I’d be thrilled. I recorded it before my life exploded Monday (that was when we found out about grandpa’s kidney failure) and it was fun and a very nice little escape.
6. Focus on my spiritual health by meditating and doing daily devotionals – I’ll be honest, this is a struggle right now. I was affirmed by my church last week to go for certification before the district committee. I had planned to do that the end of this month but with everything going on, I’m afraid I’m going to have to put that off until January or February when they meet again. I am feeling so discouraged and frustrated with the way my life has turned that I’m struggling on the spiritual. It makes me doubt myself. So I can’t make any decisions about this now because I know I’m in a depressed state.

Right now, I’m just taking this one day at a time. This week has been so crazy and long that I want it to be over.